My crown collection

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Competing... A confession


OK I admit it I hate competing. Don't get me wrong I TOTALLY enjoy the process and preparation. I love the wardrobe and sparkle. I adore that it gives me an opportunity to take care of me for a bit. I LOVE the various categories of competition; Interview and the opportunity to discuss my platform, changes I'd like to see happen and be part of making and getting an opportunity to think on my feet. Gown & fitness: I love walking the stage and get a rush just before I hit that first mark.
I hate the scores. I hate having someone tell me I was only worthy of a 2 in fitness wear, that I lack grace in evening gown or that my interview outfit was the wrong color for my skin tone. I hate that on that one day at that one moment 5 or 7 to however many people get to, if I let them, put a number on my self worth.
But I endure it for 2 reasons. First, it keeps me working out. I hate exercise and I REALLY hate being forced to do it. I'm quite comfortable sitting at home reading, sewing, blogging, writing or any number of other things. I don't get up in the morning and think "man I can't wait to work out!" I don't enjoy what I call the S-es of working out... stinky, sweaty, sticky and sore. So I need a goal to keep me focused, competing gives me that.
Second, I'm all about my platform and volunteer work and a title helps further that work. If I win it is great and my titles have opened doors and helped me promote my platform in some AMAZING ways but all that said I really see the crown as optional. I'll do the work regardless, it just takes longer and I know too many people who can't afford to wait so I keep competing so I can unlock rather then pound doors down despite my love hate relationship with competing... OK scoring.
I now return you back to your regularly scheduled programing.

\^^^/ Ang

3 comments:

  1. Isn't that what we all hate about competing, I mean scoring? On the other hand, that is what makes competing so much like a Cinderella story. Literally, anyone can win. I have seen it over and over. The clear winner chokes on stage or the "dark horse" comes out of no where and wins. That may be the most exciting thing about competing in pageants. There is never a clear cut winner till the pageant is over and someone has a crown. The numbers are just that, a number. You, Angela, are a true queen by your actions!

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  2. I just did one pageant and it was so amazing, but hard work. I dieted and beefed up my excersize for the whole week before. I have to hand it to you lasies that do it frequently. I only wanted to do the one so I am done- but I am going to follow and live vicariously though your pageants...so do well.

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  3. I agree, Ang! I love my community service, the preparation for all aspects of competition, the difference I get to make in the lives of little children, even the adrenaline rush of the competition itself ...but I hate asking people to judge me! It definitely feels like "you're asking for it!", you know? Ah, well. The pluses outweigh the minuses so we keep going! Glad to have a sister with a matching heart to share it with.

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